Becoming Kings

What are you putting off out of caution?

Some like to plan, take their time, and make a move when they’re ready. Others like a bit of chaos and uncertainty to drive their efforts.

I’m the kind of guy who just goes for it. As someone who gets tripped up by analysis paralysis, I’ve found that jumping into something even if I don’t totally have a plan works better. 

Which is how I ended up having to teach myself stick shift. 

Take a journey with me, back to my post-college days where I’d just started working with a start up in St. Louis. I wasn’t making a ton of money, however I did have some spare cash laying around for a new car… Where am I going with this one?

You’ll need to listen to this episode of The Johnny King Show, to find out how I landed myself in that mess, while also learning how changing up your decision making pattern could be just the change you need.

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• Which way do you tend to lean? (0:57)
• Give me all the bells & whistles please! (3:43)
• Sorry sir, that’s just not gonna work. (7:43)
• Teaching myself how to drive stick. (11:58)
• What are you putting off out of fear? (14:56)
• Find your risk tolerance and take action! (17:31)

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Beware the collateral damage.

Hiking with my friend this week, he mentioned he’s got a BIG red flag he pays attention to that helps him diffuse his anger. He calls it his judge, because whenever he’s angry he starts judging everything people around him do. 

Unfortunately, a lot of guys I know have trouble recognizing the red flags. And even if they do, their instinct is to stuff their feelings until they express in even worse ways. Facing down emotions that make us feel vulnerable or weak makes pushing them away in the moment far easier than dealing with them. 

Being someone who has a lot of anger, it’s hard for me to watch others suffer from the collateral damage. My anger rarely comes out in yelling and definitely never expresses in violence, however I get apathetic and that can cause it’s own damage. Other guys explode, and do a lot more pointed damage with their words or actions. 

Thing is, shrapnel of any kind is a huge danger to relationships and can deeply hinder building a healthier life. So, how can we end this cycle? It requires something that not a lot of men are willing to do right away…

We’ve got to have a safe place to feel. 

In this episode of The Johnny King Show, we’ll learn how to finally  break the “suppression / eruption” cycle so many of us fall into on a daily basis.

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• Revealing our blind spots. (3:22)
• Supreme Court Justice. (6:44)
• Suppressing & blowing up. (9:16)
• When life goes sideways. (9:46)
• The feminine needs to feel safe. (13:16)
• Masculine & Feminine balance. (16:32)
• Healthy pressure release valves. (18:46)

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Action is the adversary of adversity.

Jesse Simpson isn’t your average guy. As a US Marine, turned firefighter, then coach, his journey to find himself has taken him all over the world… just to bring him back to the same place he started:

Himself. 

Thing is, Jesse wasn’t always the standup guy he is today. Deeply troubled as a teen he was angry, lonely, and isolated. In middle school he got into fights regularly, suffered with suicidal ideation, and almost carried it out. By high school he was kicked out by his mom because of his overflowing anger and physical violence. 

Eventually finding his footing, he joined the military and aimed to be something. And yet after years of achieving and having the “perfect life” it all felt so wrong to him. The wounded middle schooler was still alive and well inside. Today, Jesse is something entirely different. He found the means to reconcile with his past, get over himself, and focus on improving the lives of others. 

As we talked, something kept coming up. Jesse had an experience in Peru that changed everything. It was that country he kept returning to year after year to find healing and purpose. 

Kick back with this interview to learn about Jesse’s transformation, the power of refusing to give up, and the healing potential we all have with the right tools.

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• Busyness and puppy training. (1:27)
• Take a butcher knife to his wrist. (6:41)
• The giver becomes the receiver. (12:01)
• Selling all his worldly possessions. (19:56)
• His first dance with plant-based medicine. (28:26)
• Note to self: don’t punch mom in the face. (35:30)
• Forgiveness and the volume of pain. (41:48)

Find Jesse at…

• https://www.action-oriented.com/
• https://www.instagram.com/action_jesse/

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Let’s get to the root of the problem.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on the anger and emotional stifling in my life. I think where I’ve been getting to has been pretty good, and the more I share with guys, the more they open up about their stories. 

So today I want to revisit something I wrote up on social media, because I think it’s really important for us to begin understanding why we feel what we do. 

Too often we’re blocked, run by anger, and guided by anxiety. It’s an emotionally lethal combo that erodes us into being shells of who we could be. I’ve talked to a lot of guys in my time, and even if their stories are different, many end up in the same place:

Unhappy, isolated, feeling beat-down, and distant from everything they use to love. 

Some may want to call that depression, however I think it’s more than that: it’s the result of years of not knowing how to interface with feelings and thoughts. And if you’ve been feeling that way, or you know someone who has been on this path, take a listen to this episode. 

I really think it could help you pin down your state of mind and begin to make progress! 

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• Suppressed emotion. (0:38)
• You’re not alone. (3:33)
• Leaking anger. (6:38)
• What are you REALLY angry about? (10:07)
• Pushing your loved ones away. (12:35)
• Finding solutions. (14:41)

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Sometimes you’ve got to take risks.

As an entrepreneur, I often find myself testing my choices. A small commitment here, a low-risk investment there, and generally keeping everything at arms length. 

It’s not like I want to approach everything through the entrepreneurial lens. It’s more or less a habit at this point. 

Recently though, I met a guy named Sanyika “The Firestarter” Street who took my approach, crumpled it up, and threw it in the trash. He calls his approach to life and growth the “All In Method.” 

Throw caution to the wind. Give everything the attention it deserves. Live your LIFE! It’s good to be smart with money, however being too cautious with life, emotional experiences, and people you could pour into just leads to loneliness and passivity. 

So anyway, I started to go “all in,” and the results have been amazing. Only thing is you’ll need to listen to this episode to find out how!

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• Shout out to Sanyika the “Fire Starter”! (0:46)
• Start choosing 100% commitment to being in. (3:20)
• Boxing gloves or ski gloves? (6:47)
• A self-fulfilling prophecy. (11:23)
• Success vs Failure. (14:41)
• Sterling Hawkins is “All In” on skiing! (17:20)

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“Shot through the heart!”

I hope you enjoy having Bon Jovi live in your head for a few minutes. You’re welcome.

We’ve been talking a lot about anger, anxiety, and the past lately. Now that Valentine’s Day has left us, I think it’s a great time to talk about relationships. All this work we do for ourselves ultimately impacts other people, especially our lovers. 

Whether you’re single, dating, or married, there’s one big, ugly, way-too-easy mistake we can make…

Perhaps it’s not communicating more? Getting angry when hair clogs the drain? Maybe it’s having differing opinions when it comes to raising kids?

Honestly, it’s something smaller, something to do with you. 

It’s a mistake that gets in your head, drives you to make bad decisions, and ultimately crushes your self-esteem. Over the years, I’ve learned that settling is never the answer, and sometimes, to be our best, we need to let go of our relationships. 

Other times, we have to take a chance to correct the #1 mistake. I’ll teach you how in this episode of The Johnny King Show.

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• Biggest mistake you can make in love. (0:54)
• From sweet to malicious. (3:32)
• WHAT? (6:37)
• With healing brings compassion & empathy. (10:02)
• A solution offered. (13:51)
• Are you still running? (16:49)

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Sometimes a random TikTok video can take you back.

This time we’re jumping back to when I had COVID a few weeks ago. TikTok finally hooked me. When I was sick I had A LOT of immobile down time to fill, and it was just right there. 

Anyway, I came across this video from a guy talking about his old mindset, and it knocked something loose in me. 

Suddenly I was thinking back to my childhood years remembering how my family used to spend time together on road trips, and how we ended up in the home I spent most of my life in. 

These kinds of memories are so wonderful to look back on, however they also come with some tenderness because of my mom. If you’ve noticed I’m talking around what’s in this episode. I really don’t want to spoil what’s in store in this episode of The Johnny King Show… besides the confession that I’m hooked on the ‘Tok. 😉 

Listen for some snapshots of my childhood — for once young Johnny wasn’t being a goofball — while getting a dose of mindful reflection.

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• My confession. (0:34)
• Letting go of “things”. (3:11)
• Getting out before the floor fell out. (7:20)
• Getting a little choked up. (11:20)
• The ego drives our behaviors in a variety of ways. (15:23)
• Slow down and make some magic moments. (18:49)

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Put down the gavel, man.

Some of us got one of those big judgers hanging out in our heads. You know, the voice that relentlessly calls you out for things you have no business paying attention to. 

The problem is, it’s a pattern that can take over. How many times have you lost your way on something because of the judgement you face inside? If you’re like me, you might have thought you put the guy to bed, permanently, only to discover the judging just became sneakily subtle. 

And man is it frustrating to notice how often we passively undermine our efforts day over day. Instead of feeling bad, and wondering what it would be like to not judge yourself, I want to present a different path forward:

Inquire. 

Take the judgement to task by putting it on the stand. Make the judgement explain itself, and treat whatever it’s covering for. I’m going to teach you how in this episode of The Johnny King Show.

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• Do you judge yourself or others a lot? (0:56)
• Going back for a second listen. (2:52)
• Healthy and unhealthy judgement. (4:59)
• Politics and judgement are a horrible combination. (7:13)
• That damn mechanical bull. (9:16)
• Replacing judgement with curiosity. (10:51)

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It’s a question that really makes you think.

You may have heard the sentiment that you should never ask “Why?” to someone who’s venting or upset because it puts them on the defensive. However, when it comes to problem solving at least, “Why?” is a great question for finding out the reason behind your overwhelm. 

Leaning into the “Why?” behind achieving your goals is a sure-fire way to start winning. So, what’s the deal?

Glad you asked. 

Asking how something can be achieved, leads you into considering all the variables, before you even understand what you’re doing. Have you ever noticed that asking “How?” almost assumes something is difficult to overcome? How will you manage to de-ice the walkway, Johnny? 

Simply changing the question to a “Why?” allows you to start at a different place, while setting you up for success. Listen to this episode of The Johnny King Show to find out why.

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• “How” to accomplish anything in life. (1:14)
• Move forward to get your ducks in a row. (3:50)
• Ask “why” until you are moved. (6:31)
• What holds you back from accomplishment? (8:50)
• With a strong enough “why”, you’ll figure out the “how”. (11:38)

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Imagine yourself as a pressure cooker.

Have you ever wondered why pressure cookers don’t explode? They’re basically compressing moisture into heat… you’d think they’d eventually *blam*. 

They don’t though because they’re “smart.” The cooker can be triggered to release pressure after some time to avoid completely wrecking your kitchen. So why is it that we think that we can do what a pressure cooker can’t? 

What I mean is, why the heck do we think we can basically shove our feelings into a pressure cooker, suppress them, and never ever explode? We need those vents in our lives so that we can uh… properly cook ourselves. Okay, so the analogy doesn’t carry all the way through. 

However, the explosion piece is what I want to focus on today. Sometimes people bottle until they’re saying things they don’t mean, are tapping into some pain deep inside that informs their actions. For people like me though, the suppression forces me to shut down (like a faulty pressure cooker). 

In this episode we’re going to figure out how to get everything working again, and how you can start expressing rather than suppressing!

In this episode you’ll learn about…

• Celebrating 150 episodes. (0:38)
• Doing a “live autopsy”. (4:21)
• Feeling bad emotions scares us. (9:43)
• Suppressing negative emotions. (14:22)
• Anger release writing. (19:43)
• Do you have powerful ways of emotion release? (23:56)

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